At the Doctor’s Office

There’s nothing worse than a Doctor’s Receptionist who insists you tell her what is wrong with you in a room full of other patients. I know most of us have experienced this, and I love the way this old guy handled it.

An 86 year old man walked into a crowded waiting room and approached the desk…. The Receptionist said, “Yes sir, what are you seeing the Doctor for today?”

“There’s something wrong with my dick”, he replied.

The receptionist became irritated and said, “You shouldn’t come into a crowded waiting room and say things like that.”

“Why not? You asked me what was wrong and I told you,” he said.

The Receptionist replied; “Now you’ve caused some embarrassment in this room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong with your ear or something and discussed the problem further with the Doctor in private.”

The man replied, “You shouldn’t ask people questions in a room full of strangers, if the answer could embarrass anyone. The man walked out, waited several minutes and then re-entered.

The Receptionist smiled smugly and asked, “Yes??”

“There’s something wrong with my ear”, he stated.

The Receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her advice. “And what is wrong with your ear, Sir??”

“I can’t piss out of it,” he replied.

The waiting room erupted in laughter.

Mess with seniors and you’re gonna lose!

Focus on Problems vs. Focus on Solutions

1) When NASA began the launch of astronauts into space, they found out that
the pens wouldn’t work at zero gravity (Ink won’t flow down to the writing
surface).In order to solve this problem, it took them one decade and $12
million. They developed a pen that worked at zero gravity, upside down,
underwater, in practically any surface including crystal and in a
temperature range from below freezing to over 300 degrees C. And what did
Russians do…………………………………??
The Russians used a Pencil!!!
_________________________________________________________

 

2) One of the most memorable case studies on Japanese management was the
case of the empty soap box, which happened in one of Japan’s biggest
cosmetics companies. The company received a complaint that a consumer had
bought a soap box that was empty. Immediately the authorities isolated the
problem to the assembly line, which transported all the packaged boxes of
soap to the delivery department. For some reason, one soap box went through
the assembly line empty. Management asked its engineers to solve the
problem. Post-haste, the engineers worked hard to devise an X-ray machine
with high-resolution monitors manned by two people to watch all the soap
boxes that passed through the line to make sure they were not empty. No
doubt, they worked hard and they worked fast but they spent whoopee amount
to do so.

 

But when a rank-and-file employee in a small company was posed with the
same problem, did not get into complications of X-rays, etc but instead
came out with another solution. He bought a strong industrial electric fan
and pointed it at the assembly line. He switched the fan on, and as each
soap box passed the fan, it simply blew the empty boxes out of the line.
Moral of the story: KISS (Keep It Simple,Stupid) i.e. always look for
simple solutions. Devise the simplest possible solution that solves the
problem So, learn to focus on solutions not on problems

“If you look at what you do not have in life, you don’t have anything”
“If you look at what you have in life, you have everything”

 

When You thought I wasn’t looking, by a child

 A message every parent should read, because your children are

   watching you and doing as you do, not as you say…

 

 “When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw you hang my first

 painting on the refrigerator, and I immediately wanted to paint another one.

 

 When you thought I wasn’t looking I saw you feed a stray cat, and

 I learned that it was good to be kind to animals.

 

When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw you make my favorite

cake for me and I learned that little things can be the special things in life.

 

When you thought I wasn’t looking I heard you say a prayer, and I

knew there is a God I could always talk to and I learned to trust in God.

 

When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw you make a meal and take

 it to a friend who was sick, and learned that we all have to help take

care of each other.

 

When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw you give of your time  and

money  to  help people who had nothing and I learned that those who have

something should give to those who don’t.

 

When you thought I wasn’t looking, I felt you kiss me good night

and I felt loved and safe.

 

   When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw you take care of our house

and  everyone in it and I learned we have to take care of what we are given.

 
When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw how you handled your

responsibilities, even when you didn’t feel good and I learned that I would
have to be responsible when I grow up.

 

   When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw tears come from your eyes and

I learned that sometimes things hurt, but it’s all right to cry.

 

   When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw that you cared and I  wanted

to be everything that I could be.

 

   When you thought I wasn’t looking, I learned most of life’s lessons that

I need to know to be a good and productive person when I grow up.

 

   When you thought I wasn’t looking, I looked at you and wanted to say,
thanks for all the things I saw when you thought I wasn’t looking.’”

 

   Each of us, parent, grandparent, uncle, aunt or friend, influence

   the life of a child.

 

At the Doctor’s Office

There’s nothing worse than a Doctor’s Receptionist who insists you tell
her what is wrong with you in a room full of other patients. I know most
of us have experienced this, and I love the way this old guy handled it.An 86 year old man walked into a crowded waiting room and approached the
desk…. The Receptionist said, “Yes sir, what are you seeing the Doctor
for today?”

“There’s something wrong with my dick”, he replied.

The receptionist became irritated and said, “You shouldn’t come into a
crowded waiting room and say things like that.”

“Why not? You asked me what was wrong and I told you,” he said.

The Receptionist replied; “Now you’ve caused some embarrassment in this
room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong with
your ear or something and discussed the problem further with the
Doctor in private.”

The man replied, “You shouldn’t ask people questions in a room full of
strangers, if the answer could embarrass anyone.
                                                 ‘
The man walked out, waited several minutes and then re-entered.

The Receptionist smiled smugly and asked, “Yes??”

“There’s something wrong with my ear”, he stated.

The Receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her
advice. “And what is wrong with your ear, Sir??”

“I can’t piss out of it,” he replied.

The waiting room erupted in laughter.

Mess with seniors and you’re gonna lose!